Akosua and I were both in committed relationships when we first met at KNUST while pursuing our master’s degree. I was smitten by her beauty the very first day I saw her. To this day, she is one of the prettiest women I’ve ever met.
We became friends as the course progressed. So we used to talk about our partners. I even became friends with her boyfriend and she became friends with my girlfriend. Although we had good relationships, Akosua and I shared a bond that was stronger than that of a platonic friendship. We couldn’t go a day without talking.
As time went on, I broke up with my girlfriend after she lied about being pregnant and extorted huge sums of money from me. I was broken but I soldiered on. Akosua gave me a shoulder to cry on and did her best to cheer me up. Unbeknownst to her, her man was planning to serve her fresh heartbreak. The guy got married to a woman he claimed was his ex-girlfriend. She was deeply hurt when she found out. And I did my best to be there for her.
Although we were in pain, I comforted myself in the knowledge that we were both single. “Maybe, the universe finally aligned for us to be together.” That’s what I believed. To confirm my belief, we got so close that we had shuperu once. After it happened I thought we were finally going to start a relationship. However, my bubble busted when I found out she lied to me about a certain man in her life.
She introduced the man to me as her uncle. So I was shocked when I discovered that the man is her boyfriend, or as some would say, sugar daddy. He was the one sponsoring her lifestyle. She had already introduced me to the man as her friend so whenever he came around, it felt awkward to have the three of us sharing the same space.
I waited patiently for her to come clean about her relationship with the man but she didn’t. So I erased any notion of us ever getting together. She is a good person so I just stuck around as her friend. I avoided being alone with her in the same space. When she asked why I was acting distant I told her; “I think it was a mistake that we slept together. So I am trying to prevent it from happening again. That way we won’t ruin our friendship.” She understood, and we kept things clean between us.
As time went on, I met someone else. She calls herself Cutie, so that’s what I call her. She is different from Akosua in terms of personality, but they have one thing in common, sugar daddy. Unlike Akosua, Cutie told me everything about her relationship with her sugar daddy. She met him at her workplace. She said the man has been supportive of everything she does. He swept her off her feet when he bought her iPhone 12 pro-Max when it was new on the market. In addition to the phone, he gave her GHS5,000.
She told me about all the monetary support the man extended to her. I didn’t express any interest in her until she told me the man stopped answering her calls. She was devastated so I gave her time to heal. When she assured me that she was over him, I proposed love to her and she accepted it.
We were quite a happy couple. I envisaged our future together as a married couple, and it was blissful. Akosua knew I had a friend named Cutie but she didn’t know we had started dating. I felt I didn’t owe it to her to tell her anything, seeing as she didn’t tell me about her old man.
At some point, Akosua got the opportunity to travel to the US for her second master’s degree. I was happy for her. She didn’t tell me how she was funding her trip but I already knew.
When it was time for her to leave, I went to her place to bid her goodbye. To my utmost dismay, she kissed me. When we broke the kiss she said, “I love you.” I was confused. That was also the day she told me the truth about her sugar daddy. I acted like I didn’t already know about him. She assured me, “I will leave him as soon as I finish school and get a job. You are the one I want to be with.” I listened to everything she had to say without telling her the truth about Cutie.
After she left I met Cutie’s mother and spoke to her father on the phone. We discussed my plans to marry their daughter. I started marriage plans at the blindside of Akosua, even though I spoke to her every day. She was open enough to tell me she was going to meet her man in Dubia. As she was meeting him, she was assuring me that I am the one she wants.
By some coincidence, Cutie also got the opportunity to travel to the UK. I asked how she was going to fund her trip and she couldn’t talk. She worked at an NGO that paid her almost GHS6,000 every month but she couldn’t have saved enough to raise £12,000 to take care of the expenses. It was when she was fifty percent through with her preparations that she came out and told me her sugar daddy is her sponsor.
To say that I was shocked is an understatement. I asked myself, “How? When? And where did they reconnect for him to give her such a huge amount of money?” I helped her with the process even though I was not comfortable with how she got the money. She assured me that the man did it out of goodwill with no strings attached. Who would believe that? I couldn’t even go with her to the airport because I knew the man was going to be there. I was so sad with the way things went. Did our two years together not mean anything?
After she left I also got the opportunity to travel to Canada to do my PhD on a full scholarship. Akosua and Cutie were in touch with me and they were still professing their love to me. I listened to them but my heart was not with them.
When I settled in, I met Yve at a hospital in Toronto. She was excited to meet me because I am also from Ghana. She didn’t know anyone in Canada so she grew fond of me. We both kept each other company and love found its way into our hearts. We started a relationship and everything was bliss. Life was indeed beautiful for us. I spoke to Yve’s family in Ghana and she also formed a bond with my sister in Canada.
Guess what I found out about her later in the relationship? My Yve also has a sugar daddy. God, why me? Yve’s man promised to divorce his wife for her, and she believed him. So she was livid when the man said he would no longer leave his wife. He wasn’t willing to lose half of his assets to the divorce settlement. I didn’t like her reaction to the news but I had hope that she would choose me in the end. After all, the man was all the way in Ghana so they wouldn’t meet.
One day out of nowhere she requested that we exchange phones. I refused at first but she threw tantrums until I gave in. You won’t believe what I found on her phone. She sent him the same seductive photo she sent him two weeks prior to the phone swap. She captioned his, “Haven’t you missed me?” I was very devastated. It looks like I can’t win against these old men. I haven’t asked her but I believe he played a vital role in her move to Canada.
While I consider what to do about the relationship, I look at the heavens and ask the powers above if I have wronged an old man in my past life. Because I don’t understand why they follow me everywhere I go. Every woman I have tried to love has already been taken by them. It’s not normal that I have three women in my life who expect me to wait around until they are each done with their sugar daddy.
I know that I won’t marry any of these women because of their relationships with these old men. I just pray that the next woman I meet will be completely single.
—Ben
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